hopeful romantic

Oxford dictionary defines romance as: a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love, [and] a quality or feeling of mystery, excitement, and remoteness from everyday life. 
Wiki defines it as, well, never mind. Wiki is wrong. 

"remoteness from everyday life." yes. that's it. 

Nothing in that definition is exclusive to a relationship of two people who are married/dating/lovers. In fact, nothing in that definition excludes a person who is alone. One of my most romantic moments was in fact shared with no one. I was Rome in 2011. My mother had recently passed on, allowing for this trip. I was caught between mourning and joy, standing in the Eternal City. It was summer, and it was hot. The water was cool and inviting. For a few moments, it was just me, the water, and my creator. I was surrounded by people- mostly strangers- and the photo capturing the moment was taken by someone I knew. My three-month-old baby was nearby in a stroller. But the feelings that swelled up in me and glued me to that spot, celebrating that moment was all mine. It was indeed romantic.

My favorite scene in the movie 'The Father of the Bride' is a discussion between Spencer Tracy and his soon to be son-in-law. The bride, played by Elizabeth Taylor, had come to her father in tears, ready to call off her wedding because her fiance' bought her a blender for a wedding present. How could he be thoughtless, buying a kitchen appliance for her for a wedding present? How romantic is that?! Then there is that moment went the dejected young groom-to -be explains in an almost panic that he bought that blender thinking of how much she likes smoothies. He wanted her to always have what she wanted, and he wanted to be the one to provide it. Suddenly, a blender looked like the most romantic gift he could have considered. 'An excitement associated with love.'

The most romantic thing anyone ever did for me was line the floor of a shower room of a garage with brown paper, so that I could shower in an auto garage and still feel like a lady. I was rushed after two trips to the emergency room with two different children, a photo shoot, and being the only witness for a bride in a convalidation ceremony. I had no time to get home to clean up, and my dear friend made the best of a difficult situation without me asking. He had in the past made me feel loved, and shown his romantic side on many occasions, but that simple layer of brown paper covering every surface of the shower room made me feel like a princess.

When a good person  loves you, he will take time to listen to you. He will focus on your face and your words as you speak, and you will feel safe.
It becomes romantic when he stops what he is doing- what he is engrossed in- puts his tools down, looks you in the eye and either with his eyes or his words tell you that nothing else can come to his mind except what you are saying.  
A loving friend will say, "come over when you are finished with your errands and we'll have coffee and catch up." 
It becomes romantic when you arrive to find that she has drawn a bubble bath for you in her oversized tub, has surrounded the tub with candles and poured wine waiting for you, and says, "the next hour is all yours to be alone. I'll watch your kids." 
Loving a child can mean spending your lunch hour with her, listening to her talk about her latest playground escapade, or her first break-up. It becomes romance when you turn off your cell phone, pour her drink into a wine glass, and be sure to have her favorite cup-cake for desert. You lean in and focus on her eyes while she talks. She feels the mystery of a mother's (or a father's) love that isn't the everyday feeling she gets she you wash her laundry.


We all need romance. Those who are married, those who are single and celibate, and yes, even priests and religious need romance. Some of the most romantic people I have ever met were priests and nuns! When love is elevated to "out of the ordinary", anyone can feel the mystery of excitement of that love and it becomes romance. G*d created romance, so why would He keep it from any of His beloved, reserving it only for couples? "Thy lips are as a scarlet lace; and they speech sweet. They cheeks are as a piece of a pomegranate, besides that which lieth hid within. .... Thy lips, my spouse, are as a dropping honeycomb, honey and milk are under thy tongue; and the smell of thy garments, as the smell of frankincense." [Solomon's Canticle of Canticles,4:3,11] No one could argue the romance and yes, eros! that fills the pages of this book of the Old Testament.  It's no wonder that so many of the saints would go into what was called an "ecstasy" when praying! There is praying.. and there is romantic praying. I worship a very romantic God. 


Although in the past I have loathed the coming of Valentine's day, thinking of it as merely "singles awareness day" and thinking about the romance not in my life, this year, I am filled with a mystery of the love that I have been blessed with from my Lord, my friends, and my family.
I have learned that having romance in my life is up to me. It's my responsibility to seek it out, to even create it for myself and for my children, and to recognize it in the beauty of creation that surrounds me. It is up to me to pull out moments in an otherwise mundane day and with G*d's grace, seek a feeling of excitement and share that with the people around me, whether it means getting out the good china to serve the peanut butter sandwich to my daughter, or dropping everything and inviting my son to sit in the large patch of clover in the yard to hear about his day. 

Maybe this is why I'm truly happy and can say I like who I am for the first time in my life.
 

getting cultured

In our attempts to be healthier, we're using culture. Okay, technically, it's "cultures". 
A friend gave us a SCOBY, which stands for "symbiotic culture of bacteria and yeast". Don't be too impressed; I had to look that up for this post. 
My daughter started our Kombucha months ago. I took photos. Then I got busy with life. 

Recently because she is now a full time student, and remains a shepherdess as well as the other adult in the house, I took over the kombucha making. This means nothing is done on schedule anymore. While she took a notebook of dates, measurements, comments, etc... I look at the tea in the fermenting jars and ask, "When did I start this jar? Is it time for second fermentation with fruit? I need to buy tea....."  Then I forget about it another day. 
Regardless, the kombucha is still turning out with good flavor and a probiotic taste and feeling. It doesn't have the 'fizz' I like, but it's still kombucha, and my children enjoy it. 

Without a stove, however, brewing tea has been put off too long though. Today I am brewing a quart at a time in a glass container in the microwave. Since our microwave is the smallest available- used around here for heating cups of water/coffee/milkforhotcocoa and plates of nachos-- it's taking about ten minutes to get the water hot enough for each quart. But it's getting done. 

I've been much more diligent in keeping up with the sourdough starter given to me by another friend. I don't know how old this mother is, (that is the term for a culture; I'm not being snarky) but it is hardy. I never measure how much flour I feed it, or the water. I just add 'some' flour- either organic white or whole wheat- and a 'bit' of water every day. I have a back-up in the fridge in a form of status in case something contaminates this main starter or if I forget to feed it and it loses it's bubbles. Like I said though, it's a hardy batch and if I do see that it's losing its ability to ferment, I add a little apple cider vinegar before I give up on it. 

Harmony was in the practice of baking two loaves a few times a week. Her recipe required kneading, and she was good at it. But with the start of the semester, she was allowing more and more time to go between batches, and I could tell the timing was stressing her, so I adopted the baking. 

However, I am not one to spend time working on my upper body strength in the kitchen. So when I found a recipe for the French country crusty no-knead boule, it became my secret weapon to keeping bread in the house. It is a different texture and does not lend itself as well to different flavors as does Harmony's softer bread, but it takes little time and everyone likes it. 

Because I have this active sourdough bubbling on my counter next to my scoby, I searched for different ways to use these beautiful probiotics. Eating healthy doesn't mean my children (and I) don't have sweet tooths (sweet teeth?) This recipe for cinnamon rolls makes a super easy treat. Easy doesn't mean that it's not time consuming though, so it's not often that I can arrange the clock to have them made. 
This just might be the weekend for it! Epiphany is as good a reason as any, don't you think? 

moving to the kitchen

It's quite late after a long day of playing with/reading to/chasing a three-year-old, but I have put off this post long enough. As I stuff my face with kettle corn, I'll do my best to sum up our progress on the kitchen.
The above photo is the 'before' photo. In it you can see the ripped 1970's formica counter tops. What you can't really see is how shallow the sink is (or how stained). Maybe I just want too much, but living on a farm and cooking for six people often calls for a larger sink. My temperament wants for one that is not stained. You can also see the electric stove. Not only do I find it difficult to cook with electricity, we lose our power too often for it. This particular stove is particularly difficult because there is no rhyme or reason to the levels of heat on the dials.
The worst part of the kitchen is the 'bar' you see to the left. It serves no purpose other than to the narrow the work place on the counters. My goal was to flatten that and have one even work space for both counter appliances and people to gather. 

After assisting a friend during her labor and incredible home birth of her sixth child, I asked her husband if he would be willing to apply the same skills he used on their furniture to build counter-tops for us. He accepted the challenge and set to work following the directions I found here.

Taking out the old counter with (cast iron) sink attached was a heavy and awkward task. Whoever installed the old sink must have lacked confidence, because instead of the typical three or four screws under the sink, there were fifteen or so, and they were rusted.

It looks as though there are two types of wood going on here, but I assure you it's all the same. The way the light is absorbed and reflected from the cabinets makes it look much darker on one side. I'm okay with that. We're artists here, after all. 
My next job was to sand the wood, fill in any gaps, and seal it with a tung oil. After 72 hours, it is now ready for use! 

My favorite part of this countertop is the new open flat area for working. Besides being more visually appealing, it is a much more practical work and gathering space. 

We're especially excited about the 'new' sink I found on Craigslist. It was listed for sixty or so dollars, I can't remember exactly, but also listed with 'obo' so I made an offer. It was accepted via email, but when I arrived to pick it up, the seller and I recognised each other from a home school group and she sold it to me for $35. Thankful to her and to G-d, I nearly cried. I now have a sink valued at the big box store at over $200. The stove is the same model stove I had in my old custom built house; I missed that stove! I found this at the Habitat for Humanity ReStore for $150 a few months ago, and have been saving it. I've ordered the orifices to convert the stove to liquid propane and will hopefully get that up and cooking by next week.  

While Scott had the old counters out, I took advantage of that time to strip the paint from my cabinets. I have this problem with waiting. When I get an idea, I sometimes just move full steam ahead without considering how long it will take me to finish the job. It seemed prudent to use the stripping medium before my new counters were in place, even though I had no real plan on actually painting the cabinets yet....

Fortunately, a friend from church heard of my plight, has come to my rescue and is going to help me paint the cabinets this weekend! 
We have been very blessed by friends with the re-model. My son's godfather installed the faucet for us, and my son-in-law connected the drain, so the afternoon of Christmas we actually had running water after almost a week without. With a  little phone help from a friend who happens to be my auto-mechanic all 'round talented fix-it person I was able to install a dishwasher which I also found at the ReStore earlier last year! 
You might be able to see the floor- or lack of floor- in the above photo. We've been on the tile back cement board for several months. 
but that's another story.... 

shearing time!!

This post is quite late. The sheep were sheared last Spring, but I've been lazy busy remiss about writing.

The first step was to move them close to the back patio where the shearers set up shop. We no longer keep them in the electric pens during the day, but allow them free range in the large pastures, moving them from one to the other every month.

Little Red Riding Hood kept Cici occupied while Mamma Cherry was being sheared. 

I was coveting Cicic's wooly coat, but my Shepherdess made the executive decision to not shear her. She has since regretted the decision, after Cici's growth spurt this summer, enduring her heavy coat. But she'll warm through the winter, and we'll get an extra heavy bag of wool in the Spring.

Harmony hired two young women, who, after recently graduating from Texas A&M, started their own traveling sheering business. I was amazed at their strength and ability to get the job done.

dirty and matted under belly wool is not worth keeping

anyone who can handle ornery Banana has my respect 

The newly humiliated Banana

Mamma Cherry is next! 

The women made quick work of sheering three adult sheep, and Harmony was left with bags full of (apparently warm and cozy) wool to clean and card.

The sheeps' wool contains Lanolin, which allows rain to run off their wool and keep their skin dry. This lanolin, or "wool wax" has a wonderful smell to me, but I had no idea how distinct each animal's lanolin scent is until Mamma Cherry was sheared and our poor baby Cici could not longer distinguish her from the other two beasts! It was only when the sheep were sheared naked that we found out it wasn't the milk that a baby sheep could smell leading her to her mother, but her distinct lanolin smell. We were a bit torn between laughing and crying watching the toddler bump into our ram's side attempting to  get him to turn to allow her to nurse.

With lambing, and now shearing, we have successfully jumped two major- though routine- hurdles of owning sheep. I had a few doubts along the way, but now I think maybe our family is cut out for this farming thing after all. At least for now.

duckies in a row. sometimes.

It's not unusual for the post office out here in the country to receive boxes of live poultry. It's so common, in fact, that we left the post office with the wrong box of babies.

We received the phone call early in the morning, before the office opened, with the instructions to come  to the side door to pick up our ducklings. When took the box to the truck, however, the tiny peeps didn't sound right to me. I looked inside, and sure enough we had a box of chicks meant for someone else and our baby ducks were still at the post office. After ringing the doorbell, I made the exchange, and laughed it off. From inside the office I could hear many other chicks and ducklings peeping from various boxes. 

 
  We took our new babies home and Little Man placed each duckling in the small plastic pool that was prepared for them as their new home for next several weeks.

As they grew, we gave them outside time to find bugs to eat, and fresh air to breathe.

 and eventually gave them water in which they could swim.
We couldn't allow them to swim as early as they would do if they were being raised by their mothers. Mamma ducks take oil from their own glands and rub their babies with it, making their feathers water proof. Thus the saying, "let it roll off  you like water off a duck's back." It's not until they get older that they produce the oil and are able to do this themselves.

Eventually they got too big for the inside pool home.

We had to take a practice run to the pond to make sure they were ready for the big move to the great outdoors.

So we moved them outside to their new home. It's quite a walk from our house to the duck house; the children- with the help of a church friend and the children's godfather- built it in the back pasture near the pond.


The ducks need to be locked up as soon as the sun goes down, or the raccoons and other duck eating critters will feast. Each morning, one of the children opens the door to the house, and the ducks line up and make their way to the pond.

They do not need to be led; they know the way.

bottoms up!

Each evening, as the sun starts to set, they come off the pond (occasionally they need a little coaxing) and one of the children invites them back to the duck house with duck kibble and fresh water to be locked up safely for the night.

We've had the ducks since May, and are still waiting for the high protein alkaline eggs that we remember from the ducks we had on our old property.

Finally, this week---

Khaki Campbells (the brown ladies) and Harlequins (the one white one) are known to be good non-broody eggs layers. Once they get started, they should be laying everyday, which means with eleven ducks (one drake) we should soon be getting eleven eggs a day year 'round. Typically, they take turns laying in one nest and the eggs will be one place waiting for us in a corner of the house in the morning.
Little man tells me, however, that when he found the one egg, it was in the middle of the duck house floor and the ducks were far from it, quacking hysterically as if in fear. We might just have defective ducks.
Considering our luck with this house, it won't surprise me!